Finding A Man’s Femininity

Where It All Began…

You almost melt when you feel those silky panties brush against your fingers. You dream about freely gallivanting about in your bra and panties. You daydream about walking into work dressed as a woman and no one gasps, faints or screams. Why can’t a man just be… a woman?

For those of you who have taken that very question to task, it seems that there are typically stages through which you progressed before you arrived at the point where you have freely decided that wearing bras and panties and or women’s clothing feels comfortable, natural, and provides a highly flammable ignition source for triggering a burning sexual arousal. There is usually a readily identifiable time frame or identifiable event that set the wheels of your developing femininity in motion. I have yet to hear one of you tell me that you awoke one morning, threw your legs over the side of the bed, and when the soles of your feet touched the floor - *Boom!* - you had the flashing thought of wanting to slide on a pair of panties in order to see just what all of the hullabaloo is about. Each of you has always told me that you can at least somewhat –if not distinctly- point a finger to the origins of your love for women’s lingerie and clothes.

As I have shared with many of you upon your disclosures of events or happenings that occurred during your pre-adolescence and early teen years that you feel profoundly affected your affinity for woman’s clothing in adulthood, it seems that there are several “typical” patterns of incidence that great numbers of you report –with slightly different environmental and situational variations- to me on a very recurring basis. Some of you saw a primary female figure in her panties, and you either decided you liked the way panties looked on the female form; they were “pretty” and “girly” many of you say, and you were envious of the lace and silk. For many of you that curiosity –and/or the jealousy you felt because boys didn’t get to wear pretty satin panties- led you to the next step: you “just wanted to try them on” or “wondered what they felt like on.” You then decided to sneak and panty-jack a pair of women’s undies, so you could feel them, smell them, and slide them on when no one was around. This likely happened on several occasions -at least- over a short or maybe longer period of time. Some of you continued to sneak and put on panties during those stolen moments whenever you could; others, out of guilt, shame or embarrassment, tried to stay away from panties – and did so until you reached adulthood and could no longer resist the temptation.

Then there were those of you who were the minority sex in a house that was dominated by women: either you were raised by a domineering, controlling mother (often a single parent) who dressed you in girls’ clothes for fun and/or punishment; or you lived in a house being overrun with women, such as Mother and one or more sisters or maybe an aunt – and you were the only boy. Either way, you would up attired in girls’ panties and little ruffled dresses; some of even had sisters who used your face as an easel upon which they decorated you with make-up. Some of you liked being dressed up and treated like one of the girls, and you grew to crave that feeling of inclusion, girlishness, and female bonding; others never liked being emasculated from the start, but slowly over time came to admit an attraction that you felt compelled to fight – until it got the best of you. As with the case of other men, some of you continued your covert panty-wearing indefinitely, other stopped wearing panties after the force that drove them into them stopped – but, when adulthood arrived, so did a longing that never truly went away.

At any rate, there arrived a time in post-adolescence when you not only realized, but acknowledged the feelings of naturalness, softness, comfort, safety, reassurance, and a plethora of other feelings you associated with donning a pair of bikini panties. At that point, some of still continued –and continue now- to stifle your natural urge to get all dressed up. Those brave enough to step outside of the immense fear associated with revealing one’s proclivity for women’s clothing have taken your desires to feel feminine to varying degrees and places. Maybe you wear nothing but panties, bras, heels, and women’s garments at home. Maybe you wear panties to work under your suit and tie each day. Maybe you sneak out dressed in full clothing and make-up on an adventurous weekend here or there. Of course, then there are those of you who have decided to completely throw caution to the wind and be as true to yourselves as you know how: You dress completely like a women every chance you get, both inside and out. Regardless, I know all of you long to be able to dress freely in any particular item(s) of women’s clothing and/or lingerie you wish with out fear of judgment, condemnation, ostracism, or retaliation, and that is what ideally you should be afforded.

While I cannot give you that free rein to dress up as you wish and go wherever you want and be able to live as you choose, I can give you the reassurance that you are not alone and there are many men out there like you: they have similar backgrounds, histories, stories, feelings, and desires. I can give you a sense of unspoken coherence of thoughts and ideas, as well as a feeling of camaraderie with other like-minded crossdressers. Every time I share ideas such as these with many of you, I get the same response: I had no idea I wasn’t so alone – and you’re not…